Jokes

Little Johnny goes to his father and asks, "Dad, is god a man or a woman?"

His Dad replies, "Johnny, both. God is both."

Johnny asks, "Dad, is god black or white?'

His Dad says, "Both. God is both."

Ok, then Johnny asks, "Dad, is God Michael Jackson?!?

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Bad Luck

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she stayed by his bedside every single day. When he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer.

As she sat by him, he said, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you gave me support. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?"

"What dear?" She asked gently.

"I think you bring me bad luck."

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Santa travelling 1’st time in plane going 2 mumbai.While its landing, he shouted ‘Bombay..Bombay’ .Airhostess said “B silent”..Santa said “OK”..Ombay Ombay”

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A typical engineering student grabbed a coin,flipped it in d air n said
“heads i go 2 sleep,
tails i watch a movie,
If it stands on d edge
i’ll study


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Riddles and Anagrams

A word which can be written forward, backward or upside down, and can still be read from left to right?

Ans: NOON

You are in a room that is completely bricked in on all four sides, including the ceiling and floor. You have nothing but a mirror and a wooden table in the room with you. How do you get out?

Ans: You look in the mirror you see what you saw, you take the saw and you cut the table in half, two halves make a whole, and you climb out the hole.


A man was found dead out in a field of snow. The only tracks that were left was a set of footprints between two parallel lines. Who should the police be looking for?

Ans: A man in a wheelchair.

Anagrams
1. Tooled
2. Nero
3. Meals
4. Sault
5. Nerved
6. Ordeal
7. Counts
8. Tendon
9. Freons
10. Oilmen
Hints Us cities

Scroll down for answers




















1.Toledo
2.Reno
3.Salem
4.Tulsa
5.Denver
6.Laredo
7.Tucson
8.Denton
9.Fresno
10.Moline

Orange Chicken & Chicken Kabab

Orange Chicken

INGREDIENTS:
4 boneless chicken cut into 1-inch cubes
Marinade:
1 tablespoon cornflour
1 egg
Sauce:
1/3 cup orange flavour or orange juice
2 tablespoons dark soy sauce
1 teaspoon sesame oil
1 teaspoon brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon chili powder
1 clove garlic, minced
1 slice ginger, minced
Oil for frying

PREPARATION:
Place the cubed chicken in a bowl, and add the marinade ingredients. Marinate the chicken for 30 minutes.

While the chicken is marinating, prepare the sauce ingredients, garlic and ginger.

Heat the pan and add oil.

When oil is ready, add the garlic and ginger and fry for 2 mins.

Add the chicken and fry until it gets boiled and changes color.

Once cooked, add the sauce.

Combine the sauce and the chicken. Stir-fry for another minute and serve hot.

If you are not comfortable with the orange flavor, you can try orange juice.


Chicken Kabab

Ingredients:
Boneless chicken-1/2 kg (clean & wash)
Salt to taste
Lemon juice –2tsp
Oil/butter -3tbsp
Onion-1medium sliced
Ginger garlic paste-1tbsp
Chilli powder-2tbsp
Milk cream-1/4cup
Garam masala-1tbsp


Heat oil in a pan, put onions & fry till it turns brown, remove it and grind them to paste.
Put the chicken in a bowl , add lemon juice, salt, onion paste, chilli powder, cream, garam masala powder, & ginger garlic paste.
Mix well & let it marinate for minimum of 6 hours.
Preheat the oven to 400°F. Thread the chicken pieces on skewers, brush with butter, place on the rim of a shallow baking tray. Cook until the chicken pieces are tender.

Pakoda Kurma

Ingredients:

For Pakoda:

Onions-chopped 1/2 cup
Red chillies – 2
Bengal gram –1 cup
Garlic flakes-2
Sombu ½ teaspoon
Salt as per taste
Oil-deep frying

For Kurma:

Onion – 2
Tomato – 1
Ginger – a small piece
Garlic flakes – 4 to 5
Chilli powder – ½ tsp
Turmeric powder - a pinch
Coconut (grinded into paste) – ½ cup
Sombu (Fennel seeds) -1/2 tsp
Salt as per taste
Oil


Method:

Soak bengal gram dhal for two hours. Grind along with Red chillies, garlic, sombu and salt. Make sure its not grinded smoothly. Add chopped onions and mix well. Heat oil in a kadai and when it is hot, drop a little of grinded paste loosely like pakoda. Fry till it turns golden brown. Remove and keep aside.

For kurma

Fry one onion cut into small pieces in little oil. In a kadai put the oil and when it is hot add chopped onions and fry till it turns transparent, then add ginger garlic paste and fry for some time. Now add tomato chopped finely. Mix well. Add chilli powder, turmeric, sombu and salt. Stir well and then add the coconut-paste and fry well. Add one cup water. Cover with lid and cook for 5 to ten minutes until it boils. Remove from stove and add the fried pakodas.

Serve with rice, Chapathi, or Dosas.

Palak Rice

Ingredients

* 2 cups rice
* 1 bunch of palak (wash & boil )
* 3 to 4 onions chopped
* 6 to 7 green chillies
* 2 Bay Leaves
* Red chillies
* 1 tsp black mustard seeds
* 1 tsp jeera
* 2 to 3 Cloves
* salt (as per taste)
* oil for frying
* 1 lemon

Directions

1. Wash the rice, drain water & keep aside. Grind the boiled palak.
2. Grind boiled palak & chillies together into paste.
3. Heat oil in a cooker and add Bay leaf, jeera, black mustard, red chillies, and cloves.
4. Add onions & fry until they become pinkish.
5. Add palak and chillies paste, cook for 2 mins.
6. Add rice, salt & 4 cups of water.
7. Cover the cooker & let it cook until 2 whistle are done.
8. While serving, add lemon juice according to your taste.

Effort is important

A giant ship engine failed. The ship's owners tried one expert after another, but none of them could figure but how to fix the engine.

Then they brought in an old man who had been fixing ships since he was a young. He carried a large bag of tools with him, and when he arrived, he immediately went to work. He inspected the engine very carefully, top to bottom.

Two of the ship's owners were there, watching this man, hoping he would know what to do. After looking things over, the old man reached into his bag and pulled out a small hammer. He gently tapped something. Instantly, the engine lurched into life. He carefully put his hammer away. The engine was fixed!

A week later, the owners received a bill from the old man for ten thousand dollars.

"What?!" the owners exclaimed. "He hardly did anything!"

So they wrote the old man a note saying, "Please send us an itemized bill."

The man sent a bill that read:

Tapping with a hammer...... ......... ........ $ 2.00
Knowing where to tap.......... ......... ...... $ 9, 998.00

Effort is important, but knowing where to make an effort makes all the difference!

Stuffed Capsicum

Ingredients:

5-6 Capsicum
2 boiled potatoes
2 tbsp boiled green peas
1 Onion finely chopped
1/4 tsp turmeric powder
1/4 tsp Garam masala
1/4 tsp Dry mango powder
Red chili powder to taste
Salt To Taste
Oil/ghee for frying

Preparation:

• Wash the capsicum and boil them whole till they are tender (not too much), drain water and keep aside to cool.
• Mash the boiled potatoes.
• Now in a pan heat 2-tbsp oil/ghee and add chopped onion and fry till it turns golden brown.
• Now add all spices, mashed potatoes and peas and fry for few moments.
• With a sharp knife cut the stem of the capsicum and take out seeds from the top gently and add the stuffing in it.
• Now take oil/ghee in a kadhai and fry the stuffed capsicums on all sides.
• Garnish the capsicum with chopped coriander leaves and thinly sliced rings of tomato. Serve hot.